Draft of Bush’s Next Speech LEAKED!
Good afternoon. As you all know, I held important meetings last December to talk about the situation in Iraq. I went on a listening tour to hear what different areas of government had to say about
my legacythe establishment of democracy in Iraq. We had productive discussions abouthow I’ll blame the Democratsour shared duty to forge a bipartisan approach to succeed in the Middle East. I even worked during myChristmas vacation to make sure that we had a plan for a strategy to succeed in Iraq. [pause here for laughs]
The American people need to understand that the Iraqi people want us to succeed, and that a successful Iraq means that we’re safer here in the United States. Iraq is in a vital region of the world and the security of the American people depend on victory in Iraq. And we’ve
gotten off to a good startwithseen the Iraqis make their own way with the execution of the man whotried to kill my dadkilled his own people, Saddam Hussein.I asked the generals on the ground for advice and I
ignoredlistened to what they had to say. I met with Prime Minister Tony Blair and one of Iraq’s most influential Shia leaders, His Eminence AbdulCasey al KasemAziz al Hakim. I met with the Iraq Study Group chaired by formerfamily friendSecretary of State James Baker and former Congressman LeeGrantHamilton and read their book.I dog-eared the pages where I could twist their words [laughs].I seriously considered their recommendations and I appreciate all their hard work and bipartisanship.
I heard from
nearly everyonethe Democrat leadership that I need to consider ways to draw down our troops because otherwise the Iraqiswill hide behind our skirtshave no impetus to stand up. It was real interesting, what they said. Iwdon’t agree with this perspective. I believe that we need to increase ourpresentspresence in the region, because, in one ofmy favoritethe leading statements of the Iraq Study Group’s report, they write that leaving would “almost certainly produce greater sectarian violence” and lead to “a significant power vacuum, greater human suffering, regional destabilization, and a threat to the global economy.” See, the withdrawal of troops would also expose our energy resources to terrorists and sectarians. It’s very important tomy friendsour national economy that we have no disruptions in the flow of oil and not be held hostage byforeign oil companiesterrorists.Generals Abizaid and Casey disagreed with my idea of a troop surge and told me that our military is stretched to the breaking point. That we don’t have enough ready reserves to call up for any kind of sustained presence in Iraq. Both General Abizaid and General Casey did a heckuva job in Iraq, but after we talked,
I told them they were fired if they didn’t tell me what I wanted to hearthey announced their retirements. As you know they have been replaced by two fabulous guys, Admiral William Fallon, whose experience in the Pacific will provide a new and novel approach to the position of head of U.S. forces in the Middle East, and Army Lieutenant General David Petraeus, who has done such a great job training Iraqi security forces, will be the top American general in Iraq.Both Admiral Fallon and General Petraeus
said the right wordsthink that increasing troop numbers is, in the long term, the solution to calming the sectarian violence. Therefore, I am calling for a surge of at least 20,000 troops over the next several months to protectour intereststhe people in Iraq and the Middle East region. In addition, I’ll be asking Congress for $1 billion to provide jobs forDick CheneyHalliburtonthe Iraqi people to better involve them in the growth of their country.Thank you, and now I’ll take questions.
Cliff Lyon
Christmas vacation to make sure that we had a plan for a strategy to succeed in Iraq. [pause here for laughs]
January 7th, 2007 at 2:53 pm
First question, from Helen Thomas: “Are you still the President, and if so, why?”
Actually, Bush won’t take questions.
January 7th, 2007 at 3:15 pm
Those deletions in context are really funny.
P.S. The ‘diehard ??% bush supporters, those 12 (+1 - Leiberman D) senators, and the top 400 admin hawks, ought to be able to ’surge’ the pants off the remaining terrists over in the ME. Then it’s only a matter of waiting for a few half-lives of DU to pass, before we can git our oil back. The big plus here is that we will no longer have that crew to kick around anymore, (assuming the plan fails), and we’ll have to come up with more creative ways to spend our time.
Helen Thomas rocks. Was he ever the President, and if so, Why?
January 7th, 2007 at 3:37 pm
What’s with the hole in Bushie’s neck? If it’s a blowhole, shouldn’t it be on the top of his head? Maybe someone is trying to suck out his brains….and can’t find them.
January 18th, 2007 at 6:45 pm
3. Tony Blair is a Christian so any war he starts is automatically just4. The United Nations is irrelevant and wrong, especially when they disagree with Christians like George and Tony5. We don