Larry BerganSpread Some Joy Next Tuesday!
Walk up to every stranger you meet with a slightly happy but incredulous expression and say, “did you hear the news?” Your action will peak their interest and they’ll say, “no what?” Then say, “Cheney just died of a heart attack!”
Don’t be cruel though. Tell them it’s April Fools day.
March 29th, 2008 at 5:41 am
Larr’ I know a fellah’s gotta dream, but that you would even joke about such a thing breaks my ever-so-dyed-in-the-wool-conservative heart! And besides, he’d prolly rize up three days later, fer real…….
Late March fools!
March 29th, 2008 at 6:08 am
Scientists an the European Center for Nuclear Research, or CERN, have played down the chances that the collider could produce, among other horrors, a tiny black hole, which they say, could eat the earth!
Good news for republicans!
More late-March foolishness, but not untrue.
March 29th, 2008 at 6:13 am
More….
John McCain is a war hero!
The republican hierarchy is sane!
Larry! this IS a lot of fun, thanks.
March 29th, 2008 at 8:26 am
Masochists of America unite to pick- up, not only Dick Cheneys’s salary, but also his health-care costs!
No joke.
March 29th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
caveat:
A tiny black hole. Wow, I’m having a hard time visualizing what that would look or be like. Do you have a link to an article?
March 29th, 2008 at 5:36 pm
Authoritative?..you may sort it out, (I have not) but…
March 29, 2008
“Asking a Judge to save the world and maybe a whole lot more.”
by Dennis Overbye
More fighting in Iraq. Somalia in chaos. People in this country cant afford thier mortgages and in some places they can’t even afford to eat rice.
none of this, nor the rest of the griminess on the fron page to day will matter a bit, though, if two men persuing a lawsuit in federal court in Hawaii turn out to be right. They think a giant particle accelerator that will begin smashing protons together outside Geneva this summer might produce a black hole that will spell the end of the earth, and maybe even the Universe.
Scientists say this is very unlikely - though they have done some checking, just to make sure.
The worlds physicists have spent 14 years and $8 billion dollars building the large Hadron Collider, in which the colliding protons will recreate the energies and conditions last seen a trillionth of a second after the big bang. Researchers will sift the debri from these primordial recreations for clues to the nature of mass and new forces and symetries in nature.
But Walter L. Wagner and Louis Sancho contend that scientists at CERN have played down the chances that THE COLLIDER COULD PRODUCE, AMONG OTHER HORRORS, A TINY BLACK HOLE, WHICH THEY SAY, COULD EAT THE EARTH! OR IT COULD SPIT OUT SOMETHING WHICH THEY CALL A STRANGELET THAT WOULD CONVERT OUR PLANET TO A SHRUNKEN, DENSE, DEAD LUMP OF SOMETHING CALL “STRANGEMATTER”. Thier suit also says CERN has failed to provide an environmental impact statement as is required under the National Environmental Protection Act.
March 29th, 2008 at 6:53 pm
Larry, as for black holes proper or any other hole in a fluid situation, It comes down to an Axis, All the gravitation playing against orbital tendencies, that might be analogized by water going down the drain, ‘cept in the case of a black hole, the mass is grinding into finer and finer particles, releasing energy all the while and all the while compressing. My son has just now indicated that it will end up about half the size of a green garden pea.
March 29th, 2008 at 7:01 pm
He left out that it is actually a collapsed neutron star. The gravitational force surrounding it would be strong enough to bend time, space, and even energy itself. Since those force-fields are so strong, they can bend light around them, which only makes it appear black, and it eventually reaches a point called singularity, and the normal rules of physics as we know them would cease to apply.
March 29th, 2008 at 7:13 pm
Somehow, somewhere, the article that I so laboriously typed into this golderned blog has been sent to moderation for scanning. Perhaps it will be made to surrender its nipple-rings.
March 30th, 2008 at 12:10 am
Holy cow, I’ve been worried about unitary executives when I should be worried about singularity. Sounds dangerous as hell, but cool at the same time!
Singularity, that is.